If Only…

March 19th, 2012

by: Kelly Barnes

Don’t be an “if only” person.

An “if only” person has a list of things they wish they would have done. “If only I had traveled more.” “If only I had learned to play the piano, ran a marathon, went back to school…” These are the regrets that they encounter after it is too late to go back and do them.

Hopefully, for you, it is not too late to stop existing and start living. What memories do you want to make? Write them down. Don’t take a few minutes, take a few hours. Take the time to invest in you and make your life a story others will want to hear about. People spend more time deciding what they are going to wear than they do deciding how they are going to live.

Long before the movie “The Bucket List” was made, a 15 year old boy named John Goddard sat down at his kitchen table and wrote out his “life list.” There were 127 goals in all and they were BIG! Some were out of this world in fact. If you click on the link you can see them all and see what he has accomplished. It is truly amazing. What separates John Goddard from most people is not his financial situation or all the free time he has to do them; it is his drive. The 127 items he wrote down were not just goals, they were priorities.

I am sure your goals are difficult, hard to reach and they will result in some failure but remember there is no effort without error or shortcoming. Success is not in the achievement but in the try. If you do fail, at least you fail while doing and not from the sidelines wondering.

In 20-30-40 years will you have a head full of memories or a heart full of regret.

The greatest regret in a persons life is not to say they failed; it’s to say they never tried.


Go do the things you have dreamed of and then some.

Start With Why

March 14th, 2012

by: Kelly Barnes

If you set goals for yourself do you ever ask why? What are the reasons for wanting to accomplish them? There is power in the why. The why gives you the desire to start, the ability to persist and most importantly it is the barrier that keeps most from accomplishing anything.

Why do you want to lose weight, get a promotion, start a business or (fill in goal here)? If I were to ask you the reason why I could tell you, with confidence ,whether you are likely to accomplish the goal in the first place. I have found that most people set goals for negative reasons.

I want to lose weight because I am tired of being fat.

I want the promotion because I am tired of being broke.

I want to start my own business because I hate working for someone else.

When the reason you set the goal is negative you will look at every aspect of that goal in a negative way. Ask why and find the right reason.

I want to lose weight becasue I know it will make me look, feel and act 10 years younger.

I want to start my own business so I can build something that I and my family can be prooud of.

I want to get a promotion so I can have more financial freedom and make memories with my family.

Changing the why is a small change but makes for a big difference. Have a goal? Make a list of why you have it?

Remember; you dont pay the price for losing weigth, you enjoy the beneifts of being healthier. You dont pay the price for getting a better job or higher salary, you enjoy the benefits that come with it. When the WHY is there, the TRY will follow.

21 Day Challenge

March 7th, 2012

by: Kelly Barnes

It can take anywhere from 21-66 days to train the firing patterns of the neurons in your brain thus forming a new habit. The following is a challenge I give to students and adults and ask them to follow for 21 days. I saw this challenge in a TED Talk given by Shawn Achor, CEO of Good Think Inc. I have changed it a little and added challenges that I have found help people get from where they are to where they want to be. Try it and let me know how it goes.

In a 2 minute span of time for 21 days in a row

1) Write down 3 new things you are grateful for.

Make sure you write 3 NEW things each day. You may find that after a while you really have to search for things you are grateful for and that is why this is helpful. Eventually your brain will start to retain a pattern of scanning your world looking for positives instead of negatives and when it comes to people and situations you always find what you are looking for.

2) Journal

Journal for 2 minutes on one positive experience you had in the past 24 hours. Taking time to write about the experience causes your brain to re-live it.

3) Exercise

This has two positive effects. 1) Exercise will increase your energy levels, health and self-esteem causing you to feel better, look better and want to do it more. 2) Exercise teaches your brain that your behavior matters.

4) Random acts of kindness

Each day send one note of thanks, encouragement, praise… A text or Facebook message is ok, an e-mail is better but a hand written letter is ideal.

5) …And then some

Find one area of work, school or personal development each day and do a little bit more than is expected. Run an extra tenth of a mile, study for an extra 10 minutes, make one more sales call or learn something new about a specific area of interest.

Make it a habit.

… And Then Some

March 5th, 2012

by: Kelly Barnes

Little things make the biggest difference. Turning on the T.V. and finding out that your favorite show is having an all day marathon, pulling out your winter coat and discovering a 5 dollar bill in the pocket, hitting every green light on the way to work…

Although these are small and seemingly unimportant events, they can make a huge difference in your day. If the small things mean so much to you then they must mean the same for others. I have been teaching students, business professionals and teachers to be an “…and then some” person. Yes, it is a simple concept but I love simple. Simple is easy to understand and more importantly, easy to do.

“…and them some” people set themselves apart from crowd in small acts repeated time and time again. They do what is needed and then some, they do what is expected and then some, they do what is right and then some, they do what they said they would do and then some. Here are some easy examples we can start today:

And then some people don’t just meet deadlines, they beat them by a day.

And then some people don’t just make the sales call as promised, they follow up with a thank you letter.

And then some people don’t just text or facebook a friend on their birthday, they send a card or call and sing happy birthday.

And then some people park a few spaces away and leave the close parking spaces for those who may need them.

And then some people don’t just study for what is going to be on the test, they study for what could be on the test.

And then some people give a little more time, do a little more work, run a little farther, laugh a little louder. They are always looking, wondering and thinking of how they could do a little bit more.

When you make it a habit to do the little things you will end up being the person you want to be… and then some.